Moms Who Drink Too Much

This week, 20/20’s Elizabeth Vargas took an in-depth look at “Moms Who Drink Too Much,” citing the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse’s statistic that one third of the alcoholics in this country are women. If you find that number to be surprising, click here for clips from the ABC’s 20/20 report and other links/info regarding women and alcohol.

Most importantly, the show brought awareness to a growing trend—moms, not just teens or adult men, are suddenly confessing to drinking problems. Ironically, one of the key stories was about an author who touted mommy-drinking as social and fun:

"To fans and readers, Los Angeles-based comedian and author Stefanie Wilder-Taylor was a breath of fresh air. Her laugh-out loud books, "Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay," and "Naptime Is the New Happy Hour," and her blog, "Babyonbored," seemed to champion a little liquid courage to help moms through their day." But one morning, Wilder-Taylor, found herself in an emergency ward with a severe hangover.

She is not alone. At alarming new rates, moms are being cited for driving carpool while intoxicated, hiding wine in their coffee mugs in the morning, and entering 30-day treatment centers for addiction to alcohol. The article cited the following contributing factors in mom's lives as reasons for their turn to alcohol: "Regrets and expectations often push women deeper into their addictions, experts say, and the double-standard and stigma associated with alcoholism often keep a woman's disease under wraps."

As detailed in my book, Keep The Change, I describe the way out of any addiction or recurring problem in four steps. The first step in change is awareness. Sometimes it takes intervention from friends or family and sometimes it takes hitting bottom. But it is a fact: denial will never elicit change; it will only delay it.

The second step is where the power to change is released and it occurs the moment we admit to ourselves and others that we have a problem. Change is free to happen when we admit that we can’t change on our own—that we need the help of God and others. Once we stop hiding, we can start healing!

The third step in change is to submit to a day-to-day action plan (whether it requires in-or-out patient recovery, daily meetings at AA or other sobriety groups, and the scrutiny of a support team). The most effective way to achieve change is with a specific, detailed plan--not by embracing a vague, haphazard or general concept.

And the fourth and final step in changing your life is with accountability. Accountability is the best (and most fulfilling) way to achieve life-long sobriety. (I know, I’ve lived with my sponsor for 32 years and I have 32 years of sobriety to prove it!)

If today’s blog strikes a chord in your life—perhaps you, a friend, or a family member might have a drinking problem—I’d like to suggest that you make a few little changes that can have big results.

First, click here to take a short alcohol quiz developed by experts. If you answer “yes” to four or more questions, then you’ve taken the first step toward change: awareness. Second, consider getting help for yourself or someone you love—it begins with a conversation that can actually save a life. Next, check out AA online. It won't hurt you to do this! Then be willing to go to a recovery meeting with someone who needs support (Believe me when I say that it is very difficult to go to a recovery meeting alone--going with someone is a gift you can give them). Finally, get educated on the issue of alcoholism—visit websites such as the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse for both research and recovery information for adults and students.

Be encouraged to make a difference,

Becky