True Change Just Doesn't Happen

As the New Year approaches, I'd like to expose three of the more common "Rez Busters" before you make a New Year's Resolution!

Buster #1: Too Long – After two weeks or even two days, many of us give up on a goal as soon as we realize that our goal will take more time than we have planned for achieving it. It happens the moment we become discouraged, or impatient, or quickly bored with our new (usually less fun) routine. The best antidote for this Rez Buster is to have an accountability partner. Whether a coach or a friend, we need someone (visible, physical, and friendly) to remind us (a) that we REALLY wanted to achieve it and (b) that’s it’s worth the effort to keep on “keeping on.”

Buster #2: Too Busy - Initially, most of us have great intentions and true passion to change, but we tend to be unrealistic with the limited number of hours in our day/week. If you start something new and you are already a busy person (overworked, overwhelmed, or overcommitted), you will need to eliminate something currently in your schedule to make room for the new routine. To avoid this Rez Buster--whether you want to take a class, join a gym, or eat healthy—you will have to plan ahead to grocery shop, prepare meals, add “to-and-from” drive time to your day, or set the alarm to get up earlier or go to bed earlier than in the past.

Buster #3: Too Hard – We’re all susceptible to quitting when something gets too hard. The problem with fatigue is that it is convincing. We DO feel tired, and sore, and weak. And that is normal. My husband is a marriage counselor who reminds couples when they complain to him, saying, “Marriage shouldn’t be this hard,” that healthy, successful relationships DO take work, they ARE hard at times, and that it’s natural to feel that way! To overcome this Rez Buster, you need to talk to and hang out with people who have achieved and sustained the goal you want to achieve. For example, at AA meetings, those of us with years of sobriety are of great encouragement to those who are just beginning. We are living proof that hard work is both required, possible, and worth it when pursuing a difficult goal.

Having been married and sober for almost thirty-three years, I know that accountability, planning, and encouragement are the keys to turning “consecutive days” into decades of consistency. So before you set your goals (which I hope you to do), make your resolutions with eyes wide open, and remember, that one day at time is the best “little change” you can make if you want to see a big result!

Be encouraged and Happy New Year,

Becky