Change Our Culture One Body, One Conversation at a Time

In the past week, body-enhancing procedures for young girls is making big news, such as injecting botox into 8-year old beauty pageant contestants and toning torsos with tennies for tweens.  

As a speaker and mentor to teens and twenty-somethings, I believe, as a nation, we have successfully demanded that our young generation of girls and women attain a certain look that is impossible to achieve without some form of starvation, obsessive physical activity, or engaging in plastic surgery or cosmetic procedure in order to enhance or reduce ones size or weight.  And even more alarming is the amount of bullying that is prevalent in our schools toward those who are not considered popular or “lovely.” 

This week’s new stories may sound outrageous, but they don’t seem to be going away.  Teachers and parents will be the first to tell you that they are quickly becoming trends.  

So rather than ignore or shy away from the reality of these and other “hot topics”--such as hyper-texting, getting “high” on legal substances and drugs, or sexual abuse and binge drinking on college campuses--why not make one little change in the way you view these topics and become educated and interested in them?  

Why not initiate a conversation with the students in your life to find out what they really think about these and other stories?  You’ll either be surprised at their resolve to push-back against culture or saddened by the lure of culture to diminish a young person’s uniqueness, individuality, or self-image.  The big result?  You might change someone’s mind about how they look at themselves by affirming and complimenting them.  You might even save a life.  I mean this sincerely...you never know when your comment or concern for a neighbor, relative, co-worker, or service helper can redirect their path on any given day or night.

Be encouraged,

Becky

PS. Little Changes Big Results Blog, begun in August 2009, will continue to be the home of my weekly “challenge,” posting each Monday morning.  Additionally, my new radio show, Little Changes Big Results® Radio will stream daily, live at KPRZ.com or be archived Monday - Friday by 5 pm PST at its own, new home.  I invite you to “follow” that blog and receive the daily link and post to hear or download apps the show for your cell phone!  Just click here to follow or listen.  Most of all, I invite you and your friends to tune in or call in during the "live" show, 1:30-2 pm PST at 866.577.2473.  

Memories of a Mother

Last year on Mother’s Day, I reluctantly posted my blog, Red Flags of Abuse on College Campuses. Today is the one-year anniversary of the death of a young UVA Women’s Lacrosse player who was found murdered in her dorm room by her ex-boyfriend.

One year later, on this Mother’s Day I awoke to the current story of how Yeardley Love’s parents, family, coaches and teammates have started a foundation in her honor, to encourage young women athletes to go after their dreams. One Love Foundation's purpose is to promote strength of character and service in young athletes.

As a wife, mom, radio host, author and speaker, I believe that honoring the memory of one young girl, whose life ended in tragedy but whose legacy will be remembered through this foundation, is part of every mother’s responsibility. Being a concerned mentor—not just to our own terrific kids—but to every child whose path crosses ours—is my challenge to every man or woman who reads this blog. How? When you see signs of trouble, ask a question. When you hear friends of your children talking about someone or something they fear, get involved. Don’t think others’ children are not your problem. Today’s young generation needs and wants mentors, coaches, and spiritual parents. Let's be there for them.  It's just a little change we can make in our attitudes and actions that will have a big result!

Be encouraged to make a difference right where you live...

Becky

A Loyal, Royal Wedding--I couldn't resist...

As a woman, wife, and mom, I just can’t resist writing about the royal wedding of this past week. Though I was out of town for most of the week on business, I awoke on Friday morning at home and my first thought (being on the west coast) was, “I want to see her dress!”

Weddings are a consistent theme in the life of the Tirabassi’s! Roger, my husband, is a pre-marital pastor at one of the largest churches in our area—with a huge population of under-30’s, all of whom are in that stage of life where they would love to find their soul mate! In fact, he leads “Seriously Dating or Engaged” classes for 100’s of couples every quarter in southern California, using the materials he has developed in over two decades of counseling and marrying couples!

This royal wedding was a stellar specimen of all the time, energy, and family interaction it takes to lead up to the ceremony of holy matrimony, not to mention the plethora of details and decisions that will consume the hours, days and months before the actual wedding day.

That is why Roger (and our church) requires a couple to receive Seriously Dating or Engaged Pre-marital training or counseling before they walk down the aisle! (Click here to listen to our interview on Dr. Laura’s Show regarding Roger's classes and workbook.)

Those of us who have been married AT LEAST ONE WEEK will be the first to tell you that marriage has a unique way of changing things! What you thought was funny or cute about your spouse before marriage, often becomes a little irritating or frustrating after marriage! That’s why taking a personality profile, learning communication skills and drills, preparing a couple’s budget and discussing family of origin can be SO helpful to newlyweds! It gives couples sound, proven tools for navigating their first big argument or disappointment.

This royal wedding reminded the world that a wedding is sacred. It is a commitment made in front of God and others. It is and has been called “holy matrimony” for many centuries.

Here is my “little changes, big results” challenge to you after enjoying this week’s royal wedding:

Today, if you’re married, why not renew your wedding vows in front of God and others? "I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith/myself to you."

Today, if you’re seriously dating or engaged, I encourage you to attend a pre-marital course or ask a mentor couple to take you through a workbook such as Seriously Dating or Engaged. Remember, statistics show that between 15-20% of engaged couples don’t get married—and that’s okay! It’s better to do the (sometimes) difficult “couples” work before marriage than to find out after marriage how unresolved differences can be destructive.

Announcement: beginning May 2nd, between 1:30 and 2 pm PST DAILY, you can ask Roger or me a question--LIVE--on air in San Diego or online at KPRZ.com -- listen in and call-in at 866.577.2473 or Tweet us and Facebook us BeckyTirabassi. We'll take your calls and questions on all things to do with relationships: marriage, dating, parenting, etc.

Be encouraged,

Becky

The Coach and The Counselor coming to radio!

Roger and I have taken the leap.

We--the "coach" and the "counselor"--are launching a daily, daytime radio show called, "Little Changes Big Results!"

We begin May 2, 2011 in San Diego and we'll be streaming online at KPRZ.com across the world from 1:30 to 2:00 pm PST, Monday through Friday.

You can call-in from anywhere to 866.577.2473 and we'll answer your questions or we'll help you solve your relationships woes, marriage miscues, dating dilemmas, or fitness plateaus.

Until we begin, why not ask us a question on this blog (or by email) that we can answer on air?

If you prefer anonymity, just write to us at tlc@changeyourlifedaily.com. Our goal is to give you a little change that has a big result.

All we need is you! This will be a "live" call-in show--so be sure to tune, tweet, and call in!

More details to follow in the coming weeks.

Be encouraged,

Becky

Safe Families -- You can make a difference TODAY!

At our pre-Easter amphitheater service in which all the Christian churches across our county were invited, a challenge was made to BE the church. After enjoying great worship music and hearing a stirring message by the well-known author of Crazy Love, Francis Chan, we were asked to follow the lead of the Son of God, Jesus, whose life we had come to celebrate.

We were reminded that Jesus told his disciples to be known by their love, to care for the poor and orphaned, to become His feet and hands, and to store up treasures in heaven not on earth. We were then given an opportunity to text a $10 donation to our local chapter of an amazing national organization called Safe Families. I don't know how much we raised in that service--there were 1000's of us in attendance. I do know that we were all changed by the stories and the positive impact that Safe Families was having on families and children in crisis due to drugs or abuse or abandonment. The donations--as well as a willingness to take in a child for a short while--ARE MAKING A HUGE difference in the lives of children in our community.

Please, consider celebrating the life of Jesus this Easter with a gift to your local chapter of Safe Families. Give. Get Involved. A little change--in this case, $10--will have a BIG RESULT in the life of one child, one family in crisis.

Be encouraged,

Becky

Weight Loss Now Shown to Improve Memory!

Now there is ONE MORE reason to eat healthy and exercise regularly! A new study revealed that weight-loss surgery patients, who lost 20-25 pounds, after twelve weeks, had additional positive side effects such as improved memory and increased concentration. The research, headed up by a Kent State University professor, John Gunstad also suggested that those who don’t have weight loss surgery BUT take concerted steps to lose extra weight would also see the same results:

"I think one of the important take-home messages for this study," he said, "is really just, kind of, a reminder for individuals that if you take care of your body, you're also taking care of your brain.”

Whether you are overweight or not, staying healthy in America is a constant concern for people of all ages due to our fast-food eating habits, soda-pop drinking binges, and the increased chemically created non-fat, non-sugary substitutes in our diet.

No matter how old you are, you can make a few little changes TODAY that will have BIG results for your body and your mind in just a short amount of time.

1. Get sober. Cut out bubbles, chemicals, and sugar by cutting out pop. I call it “soda-briety.” Replace your liquid intake with water spiked with lemons, cucumbers, mint and ginger!
2. Walk more. That’s right. 1700 steps on a pedometer equals 1 mile. Wear one for a day or a week and see how far you walk on a given day. Then compete with yourself. Get up to 10000 steps a day and watch your weight drop off.
3. White out. Consciously reduce salt by adding pepper or other spices to your meats, eggs, etc. Exchange white flour for whole grains—oats, millet, rye, or corn. More fiber will fill you up sooner.
4. Melt fat. Monounsaturated fats are always a healthier choice—olives, olive oils, avocado, nuts and seeds are tasty substitutes for mayonnaise, butter, or saturated fats. Eliminate fried foods from fast-food restaurants and instead enjoy soup/salad/sandwich combos at deli or sandwich shops.
5. Count calories. Portion control is the rule of thumb. Unless you are an extreme athlete, 1600 to 2000 calories a day is a substantial caloric intake for those maintaining a healthy weight.
6. Read labels. Most restaurants and all packaging of foods and drinks contain caloric, fat, and sugar (sodium) counts. Just being aware that a candy bar has 300 calories or a can of soda has 240 calories (or more)—which is 1/5 of your daily caloric intake will help you make better decisions. And on those occasions when one item is 900 calories, you might choose to split the entree with someone or eat something with fewer calories.
7. Role model. Everyone needs someone who will help him or her succeed. If you have friends, co-workers or family members who are striving to lose weight or get healthy by exercising more, offer to be a walking partner or eat at restaurants that are healthier. Don’t be a temptation, be an accountability partner.

Each of these little changes is achievable today--they don't require money, just motivation. Most importantly, these little changes will add up to big results such as: reduced risk of diabetes, improved cardiovascular health, noticeable weight loss, and even the potential of increased memory!

Be encouraged,

Becky

Take the Family Dinner Challenge!

"More than a decade of research at The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University has consistently found that the more often children have dinner with their parents, the less likely they are to smoke, drink or use drugs. Simply put: Dinner makes a difference."

If you have kids, you owe it to yourself to take a quick view of this study and survey...

Here is what you'll find…

1. Why don’t more families eat dinner together if it has such a positive and powerful effect on the kids?

Families surveyed who don’t eat dinner together say they are just TOO BUSY with work, sports, or different activities.

2. What gets in the way when families do sit down to dinner?

Electronic distractions—cell phones and blackberries and computers.

3. How long does a family dinner usually last when they do sit down together?

The average family actually spent about 30 minutes together at the table—otherwise they ate alone or with friends.

4. What other benefits occurred as a result of a family eating dinner together?

Teens were more likely to attend weekly religious services and had an easier time talking to their moms and dads if they ate dinner regularly with their parents.

This is an easy-to-understand, insightful study that gives FREE ADVICE to parents:

Make a few little changes in your family life--turn off the electronics and have dinner together each night--and reap the following big results: kids who are more likely to get better grades and less likely to smoke, use drugs or drink alcohol!

What are you waiting for? Click here to watch how one Ohio family recently took a two-week challenge to have dinner nightly with their family!

Let me know if you're up for the challenge!

Be encouraged,

Becky